Equipping and Supporting My Spouse

I've seen far to often where Dad's aren't very hands on with their babies. This isn't a bad thing to me, so I hope no one gets offended. Sometimes it's just traditional marriage roles (which is how my household is run), sometimes it's lack of interest (I've never seen this happen in any relationships I know of, but I am aware that the problem exists.) but more often I'm realizing is because our husbands aren't adequately equipped to BE hands on.

For those of us that are Stay At Home Mom's (SAHM) I think we sometimes forget (at least I do) that we know our babes better then our spouses! I've tried my hardest to make Trevor feel like an equal parent, because he is, but when it comes right down to it, he doesn't know Risto as well as I do. That isn't a bad thing, I had to learn about Risto just the same as Trevor, but the main difference is the amount of time I have to do so. I spend all day with Risto. Trevor comes home from work between 430-6 and Risto is asleep for the night by 8, that doesn't leave Trevor much time to interact with Risto.

I'm blessed to have a husband who really desires to play an active role in his son's life. I know not all men are like this and it makes me thankful, but I had to ask myself recently, am I giving my husband the tools he needs to be confident as an equal parent? I thought that I was. I've always tried to encourage Trevor as best I can. I ask his opinions, I ask him to pick out outfits, I ask him to take over for bedtime routine some nights... literally anything I can think of. I thought I was doing a great job until a few nights ago.

"I feel like you're better at doing these things because you read so many articles and mommy blogs and you're with him all day".

Those words crushed my heart. In everything I've been trying to do to make my husband feel equipped and equal, I had no idea all the time I spend reading and researching was putting a mountain in the path of HIS parenting.

I have to take into consideration his thoughts, WITHOUT spouting off facts from different articles or opinions from different blogs. I feel like an idiot!!! Here I am, blessed beyond belief to have such a great man as my son's father and I'm goofing up his confidence as a parent! AND to top it all off, I've actually fussed at him before for not being better about making decisions in regards to Risto. HELLO?!?!!? I'm getting in my own way AND Trevor's way! What a nerd!!

Ladies, if this is you too, take the time to ask your spouse how you can better equip and support them in their journey as fathers!

Trevor, I love you. I know I've apologized to you in person, but I'm saying it here too. I'm sorry! Thank you for being patient with me and I promise we're on this parenting trip together! I'm so very thankful to have you in our lives. You're the best father to our sweet little man.I love you. Risto loves you.